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Posts Tagged ‘exercise’

 

Here is the short version:

I went to the doctor for one  thing and came out–

I am critically anemic,

Level is 5.7, should be 12-14

I had a blood transfusion on Wednesday,

           levels should rise 2 points

I am either  vitamin deficient or am bleeding

           internally, most likely a little of both

I am having additional test done to find out

I cannot exercise not even walk for a while,

           maybe up to three months  (craziness)

I really believe I will be fine.

I am taking vitamins and iron.

I  have great  family and friends. (two nights this

     week people brought us  dinner)

My husband has been amazing!  He has been

     beside me this entire week, holding my hand.

I am to rest until Monday.  I should feel less tired with the transfusion.

God is good.

The long detailed version is below. J

My daughter, Kayla, reads my blog and so I have had to be silent about what I have been going through this week because she had two big test in college and I did not want her to worry about me.  So I have told my closest friends what has been going on.  Kayla’s tests are over so I can share now.

When my doctor told me Monday I was anemic she was very upset because my number was a four.  A four means nothing to me, but then she told me normal was between a 12-14.  She asked me if I was tired, been dizzy, fainted, bleeding excessively and/or breathless?  I had blogged the day before and the title of my blog was “I AM TIRED”, so I said yes to tired, I had blogged a while back I could not get my breathe but I thought it was stress related.  Sunday I had worked out and was breathless and almost threw up and almost fainted.  So I pretty much had had all these symptoms but attributed them to working too much, not working out enough, breathless because of being de-conditioned and stress.

I then went  to see my beloved family doctor and he ran more tests.  The more definitive test came back at a 5.7 which he said was nothing to brag about.  He said you need a blood transfusion tomorrow.  That is pretty extreme and then he adds that I can do NO strenuous activities until my number gets up to a 10 at least.  Hmmmm, I AM A PERSONAL TRAINER, I am all about strenuous activities.  I tried to pin him down and said, no heavy weights right?  He said I could not even walk for a while.  He wanted no stress put on my heart.  He said it was having to work hard enough but we would talk later and  maybe I could walk soon.  I really cannot wrap my mind around that one, but the serious of the anemia is starting to set in.  THIS ANEMIA IS A BIG DEAL, I have to take it really seriously.    I asked if people I knew could donate blood and he said,  “No, there isn’t time for that.”  Now I am getting breathless from the his sense of urgency. 

I went to the hospital and got my blood typed and they did more blood work.  Apparently, the hospital did not know my previous numbers because at 8:00 p.m. that night a doctor called and wanted to know why I was not in the hospital with such critical numbers.  The doctor explained her concern, when you are this anemic you are either seriously vitamin deficient or you are bleeding internally.  She asked me a series of questions and made me promise if I saw blood anywhere that I would come immediately to the hospital.  She was very kind but scared the crap out of me. 

Today I went and had the blood transfusion.  On the way there I got this thought, “Whose do I have?,  I wonder if inmates give blood?  What if an axe murderer gave me his blood?  My sister in law pointed out it could be a nymphomaniac or a vampire, my sister said she heard that you took on the other person’s personality within a year.  I texted her back and told her she better sleep with one eye open.  I did not tell my husband about the nympho because I was afraid he would be disappointed by the outcome.

The nurses were great.  One nurse told me it was a small miracle that I was walking in and not being wheeled in.  She said it must have happened over a long period of time and my body had adjusted as time went on. 

It is a small world, a nurse and I  started talking about books we liked, first secular and we then got to Francine Rivers, Redeeming Love and we knew we were both Christians.  She told me that she went to Woodstock First and I mentioned my dad had spoken there a few months back.  Her eyes got big and she started to cry.  She told me that she did not get saved until she was 40 and that my dad’s sermons on prayer were the first time she had heard that she could really communicate with God on a personal level.  We hugged and I thanked her for telling me.  My dad is special to me, but it was so good to hear he had touched someone elses life.

Six hours later I was on my way home.  The doctor and the nurse said there is a chance that I will feel more energy in the next 48 hours.  My number should rise two points and give me a good start back up.  I have appointments with GI doctors on Monday for tests.  They will see if there may be a small internal bleed or if it is just vitamin deficiency.

God is good.  Things could have gotten worse very quickly.  I never fainted, my heart did not give out and I am on the way to better health.  I am sure I will be blogging about the emotions of not exercising but enough for now.

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Boy what a great weekend.  I am tired but that is not a complaint, just a fact of a very fun filled busy weekend!!  Kayla came home and we went shopping with Candace on Saturday.  I was not excited about shopping for me but I really needed some clothes.  Kayla was great in helping me find things that she approved of and that did not make me look really really old!  🙂 

We then went to our Blog Party and had a great time with my BFF Rob.   I loved meeting everyone and having time with Kayla and Robin. I love that Kayla is an adult and we can share adult things together!

Today we went to Kayla’s church.   It was a great sermon on encouraging others and how our words can change someones life for the good or bad.  He majored on the good and how affirming others is food to their soul. 

After church we got a burger and then helped Kayla pack up and leave to go back to school.  I should be used to it, but no, I always feel like part of me just left.  We love having her but love that she is ready to go back. 

Candace got upset earlier in the week because Kayla said to her she was on her way home, she meant her dorm room.  Candace said can you believe she said that is her home.  Candace said it just made me want to cry.   It was really sweet and I think very sensitive of her.  I am proud and truthfully a little sad that Kayla is gaining her independence and feeling like an individual.  She is an amazing young woman.  She is sensitive to us, respectful of our opinion but forging on to become this exciting person that is slowly evolving as she tries different things and risk change. 

I then went and worked out with my boss.  I almost threw up.  We did a workout called the Dirty Thirty.  We did thirty of each of these exercises:  jumping pull-ups, kettlebell swings, knee-ups, lunges, 60 jump ropes, 30 burpees (I could only do the push-up part, I was seeing stars as it was) and  back extensions.  It was grueling and it shows how out of shape I am. BUT I DID IT, that is what counts!  Tomorrow I am doing cardio and shoulders.

I then went and bought groceries, made an easy dinner, bathed and am now watching Iron Chef America and blogging.  I am ready for a great night sleep!

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I would apologize for being so honest but that is why I started blogging. I wanted somewhere that I could be real and explore the ups and downs of my journey towards a closer walk with God and finding out who He originally made me to be.

I love reading happy blogs, I love having a happy site, but for me right now that is not always real.

Right now I am pushing on. My circumstances really have not changed for the better but I must continue to find ways to push on towards joy and peace. There are a lot of great things in my life that I am truly thankful for and that keeps me going. I am trying to departmentalize so that I do not let the negative infect my entire day.

I know God is with me. I know He is using these situations to bring me to a new place. I have such a range of emotions and really want to keep feeling. No stuffing these feelings with anger, food, exercise or spending. I want to enjoy all three of those so I do not want any of them to be out of balance. I have no money to spend so that makes that one easy, lol. I have not been exercising and that is not balance for me. I am working on that one. The eating is at a pretty good place. I go from very angry to weeping to numb. Numb keeps me in the game of life, angry is not pretty and weeping is just not fun!

I do find joy in my children, my friends and my job right now. My job gives me a structures that keeps me from thinking to much. My children are like balm to my heart. Their love makes it easier to breathe and keep moving. My friend Rob knows when to push and when to shove and when to listen. I need all sides of her. My God just keeps gently reminding me that He is beside me.

I really don’t have time to break down. I need to push on, keep moving and I think I will be okay. Wallowing in self pity really does not look pretty on me. :0)

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I have only exercised once in the last two weeks.  I have felt defeated and very down about myself.  I knew I just needed to make time and I would just keep working instead.  I feel the weight creeping up and I am in a panic.  My emotions are raw, my eating off and no exercise.  That is a scary Ruth Ingram.  If you look at me with your head tilted, move your eyes up or down I assume you are looking at my big thighs and cringe inside.

I know what to do, I get paid to tell people what to do, I feel better when I do it SOOOOOOO why would I not do it?  Answer that and you will be a millionaire many times over.

Today, like many days in the past few months, I have said I am going to exercise.  The difference is today I DID IT!  I overcame several obstacles and got to the gym.  I stayed out of the PT area so I would not get distracted.  I interval trained for an hour and felt great.  I did the elliptical for a few minutes and then I would do push-ups, then I would run and then do more push-ups.  I did lunges, push presses with a squat.  It was an awesome hour of exercise.  I had my music blaring, my heart rate going off the charts and then I would slow it down and then start all over again.  My body was in a full sweat!  It felt so good.
I could try an analyze why today I did it, if I will do it tomorrow, but right now I am to tired to figure it out.  I just know that I am telling my boss that I will work until one and then I will have an hour of exercise.  We will see how it goes.  I anticipate being successful and feeling good about myself at the end of each day.

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Losing and gaining weight is one of my struggles. Believing in exercise, eating whole foods and a good source of cardio is not enough. I have lived it for four years and after all that time am struggling once again. Truthfully even when I have done everything just right, the struggle was there.

I want to give the right place in my mind, I do not want to be consumed with good or bad food. I just want my eating to be nutrition and move on with more of life. I don’t want my life to revolve around how I look and what I am going to eat. I love exercise, so why is it such a struggle to make room for it in my life?

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