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Posts Tagged ‘fear’

Mis-diagnosed

Candace got sicker today.   She was lethargic, fever higher than ever.  I really felt like I needed to take her back in.  There was a two hour wait and then they had an emergency and added an hour.  Her temperature was 100.8 at noon, 102.5 at 1:30 and 104.8 at 2:00.  The nurse was great, she bumped us up and got us in earlier because of her high fever.  They x-rayed her and did not see any more pneumonia and then did a strep test and it came back positive.  They changed her antibiotic, gave her two breathing treatments to try to loosen up her chest and sent us home with breathing treatments. 

She is feeling a lot better tonight.  Her cough is less and her fever is lowered.      We are hopefully tomorrow she will turn a corner. 

I am tired.  It is so hard to see your child sick.  Your emotions are all over the place.  I have run to work and then as soon as my last client leaves I have run home to take care of Candy.  She has been a real trooper but been lifeless.  My heart has just been torn up!

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Screaming

I am 46 years old and work with mostly 20 something males. They are fun, rarely serious, very irreverent about most things and lovable on some level. They LOVE to scare me. The truth is I scare easily. I am a very focused person and so whatever I am doing I am totally engrossed in the moment. I may be on the computer, on the cardio deck, reading a book or watching TV, but whatever it is, I am very into that moment. Scaring me is not hard for them; they walk in the room and speak, tap me on the shoulder while I am listening to music doing cardio, working on the computer. I don’t just let out a peep, oh no, I let out a blood curdling scream that usually scares them and everyone around me. It is very embarrassing. The guys get a good laugh.

I have had clients come up to me while I am doing cardio and tap me and I go crazy with my scream. Besides scaring them to death, embarrassing them and myself, I have people afraid something bad has happened. The trainers around let them know, “oh no, it is just Ruth”. Of course, the first time one of them scares me they are shocked and cannot believe someone can scream like that in the middle of the day over a tap on the shoulder and they now feel it is their duty to cure me of screaming and they are brats who love to hear me. It is constant. I hear boo around every corner.

I wish I could tell you I am cured and no longer scream, but the truth is, I think I will always be a screamer. I scream at movies, roaches, and mice.  I am not sure why I scare so easily but they are all lucky I do not exercise with a gun because they would be dead many times over!

Are you a screamer?  What makes you scream?

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